人生難免有又好氣又好笑的經驗，「莫非定律」正是關於事情如何出錯的幽默規則，簡練地揭露了「人生總難事事順遂」這條顛撲不破的真理。一切從「莫非原始定律」開始：「會出錯的事，一定出錯。」（If something can go wrong, it will.）

莫非定律誕生於1949年，以Edward A. Murphy（生於1917年）命名，他是愛德華空軍基地的工程師，專門研究人類對加速度承受的能力。他發現同仁總會把加速計的固定器裝反，因而脫口說出他的觀察。有受試者在記者會上引述這句名言，於是很快在航太工程研究者之間散播開來，並陸續有人加上新的法則。

1958年，「莫非定律」正式被列入韋氏字典（Webster’s Dictionary）。但是莫非本人從未發表過莫非定律，這點倒是蠻符合莫非定律的。莫非定律至今已經發展出各種類別，從莫非通則到電腦、家庭、工作、政府等等，各種領域都有人找出屬於他們自己的莫非定律。

本書收集了各式各樣廣受歡迎、令人捧腹的幽默定律，令人驚嘆又無可反駁的觀察，包括人生百態、辦公室哲學、官僚學、階級學……等。可以在演說、書信、聚會等各種場合，隨手捻來妙趣橫生的短句，讓您在笑聲中重新體會人生的真意及語言的奧妙。

Arthur Bloch

譯者簡介

林為正

英國華威大學 （University of Warwick） 翻譯研究博士，曾獲梁實秋文學獎散文翻譯、詩歌翻譯及散文創作等獎項。目前任教於暨南大學外國語文系，講授翻譯研究、翻譯理論與實務、西洋文學概論、詩歌翻譯、英詩評賞等相關課程。譯作包括《引經據典說英文：莎士比亞篇》、《小毛驢與我》、《我輩孤雛》、《群山淡景》、《家住芒果街》等三十種。

Introduction 前言　　                            5

Murphology 莫非學　　                11

AppliedMurphology 應用莫非學　　   29

AdvacedMurphology 進階莫非學　　  41

Problematics 問題學　　                        57

Bureaucratics 官僚學　　                      65

Hierarchiology 階級學　　                    75

Committeeology 委員會學　　              93

StatesmanshipAnd Economurphology

政壇與經濟專家莫非學　　                   103

Expertsmanship 專家經　　                   117

AdvancedExpertsmanship 進階專家經  131

Accountsmanship精打細算篇　　        137

Designsmanship 設計經　　                  147

Machinesmanship機械經　　               161

Researchmanship研究篇　　                171

ComputerMurphology 電腦莫非學　　195

Academiology 學院篇　　                     203

Work And OfficeMurphology

工作與辦公室莫非學　　                       215

Systemantics 系統學　　                       229

SituationalMurphology 運氣莫非學       235

Sociomurphology(Humanship)

交際莫非學　　                                      251

MedicalMurphology 醫療莫非學　　   271

Sportsmanship-Manship運動與娛樂篇  277

Roadsmanship 出外篇　　                     289

Household Murphology家庭莫非學      301

ConsumerologyAnd Salesmanship

消費與推銷篇　　                                  321

Cosmo-Murphology莫非通則篇　　     329

Metalaws 超定律　　                             335

AcknowledgmentsAnd Permissions

Have you ever received a phone call the minute you satdown on the toilet? Has the bus you were waiting for ever appeared the instantyou lit up a cigarette? Has it ever rained the day you washed your car, orstopped raining just after you bought an umbrella? Perhaps you realized at thetime that something was afoot, that some universal principle was just out ofyour grasp, itching to be called by name. Or perhaps, having heard of Murphy’s Law,the Peter Principle, or the Law of Selective Gravity, you have wanted to invokeone of these, only to find that you have forgotten its exact wording.

Here, then, is the first complete reference book of thewit and wisdom of our most delightfully demented technologists, bureaucrats,humanists, and antisocial observers, prepared and presented with the purpose ofproviding us all with a little Karmic Relief. The listing has been made as definitiveas possible. In researching these interdisciplinary tenets, we found numerousredundancies (which verify the validity of the observations), frequentconflicting claims to authorship, and scores of anonymous donations. We are forcedto acknowledge the contribution of the inimitable Zymurgy who said, “ Once youopen a can of worms, the only way to recan them is to use a larger can.” Byapplying this Murphic morsel to the present volume, we come to realize that thisproject, once undertaken, has grown in size and scope as further principles,new and old, have been revealed by our beacon of truth.

你曾不曾才坐上馬桶電話就來？才點菸你的公車就到？才洗車就下雨，才買傘雨就停？也許當時你明白，冥冥之中有個無所不在的原理在運轉，非人力所能左右，教人恨不能有個名堂加以稱呼。也許你已經聽過莫非定律、某某原則、選擇性重力等說法，想引述時才發現自己忘了確切的遣詞用字。

本書破天荒完整蒐羅了瘋癲成趣的科技人員、政府官員、人文學家、社會觀察家的機智與智慧，編纂方式力求人人都能樂在其中，條列方式則盡可能明確。蒐尋這些跨學科的原則時，我們發現有許多是一說再說的（這也證明這些心得不假），也常遇到出處有爭議的，還有不少佚名撰稿人。我們不得不承認無法模仿的 Zymurgy 先生所投的那則：

「蟲罐子一旦打開，只有用更大的罐子才裝得回去。」